After the depression of going through a divorce, it can be hard to think about dating again. Everyone has their own timeline for when they might want to get out there. More important than the length of time is what one does during that time. It’s important to be self-reflective and mourn the loss, as well as learn what one can ‘do’ better in their next relationship. However, once you’re ready, these article will make it easier.
Healing takes time, but not all divorces embroil a broken heart. You may have been the one who need to move on, and you’re exhilarated, or at least relieved , because you’re free now. By the way, meeting someone new and diving into another relationship comes with some risks, and a new relationship might not make you as happy as you think it will, if you plunge in too soon.
One key to a calmer divorce is remaining civil with your spouse, and if they see you hurried into a new relationship, it is likely to create conflict. Divorce is already a highly emotional experience, and when someone feels doubly wronged or their pride gets wounded, they are more likely to become angry, and less likely to agree to a divorce settlement. When spouses cannot reach an agreement, this can prolong the length of the divorce process from the typical 3 to 8 months to 1 or 2 years — which also significantly increases legal costs and court fees.
Dating too soon may also impact partner support. When spouses are able to communicate civilly, they can approve on settlements that are fair to both parties, such as one partner receiving a bulk of the marital assets in exchange for little or no partner support. But a spouse who feels wronged will likely permit resentment and mistrust to affect and undermine these kinds of negotiations.
Tips To Start Dating After Divorce
Relationships are complicated and sorrow has its own timing. Check in with yourself and do your best to make an honest appraisal of how read you are to date again.
Here are some indications that you may not be ready to move on:
- You call your new spouse by your ex’s name.
- You compare every aspect of this new man/woman to your ex and this person often comes up short (it’s a natural tendency everyone has to compare new and old relationships).
- You frequently bring up your ex in conversation and refer to past experiences you had together.
- Your sorrow such anger, denial, bargaining, depression, is still quite present whether you are with your new partner or not.
- You attemp to recreate the life you had with your ex with your new spouse.
