When somebody wrongs you somehow, You may feel sure you’ll never get over it. Even after your anger has quickly passed, you may continue to dwell on the betrayal instead of letting it fade into memory.
It’s very common to feel this way. But not being able to forgive can cost you a lot. Forgiveness may seem challenging, in part because it is often misunderstood. You may believe forgiving someone means:
- forgetting what happened
- resuming your previous relationship
- implying the pain they caused was no big deal
In fact, forgiveness simply means selecting to let go of your hurt, anger, and passion for vengeance. You might accept that what happened is recently in the past, recognize that human make mistakes, and start cultivating compassion instead. Think you’re ready to forgive, but have no idea where to begin? Never mind. It’s not always easy, but you can do it.
Forgiveness sets you free. It lifts an invisible load off your shoulders. That is, perhaps, the most powerful benefit of forgiveness. When somebody hurts you deeply, your first reaction is to often lash back at this person. Bitterness and grudges are a method that we attemp to do that. The troubles is that those grudges, and that bitterness don’t harm the people who wronged us. They hurt us, slowly poisoning our minds, feelings, and other relationships.
It Brings You Peace
When you forgive someone, it may feel like we are doing it for them. By holding on to the pain you can’t let go of, you may feel like you’re seeking revenge, and hurting them back. But the individual that you are forgiving may never know that you are still thinking of how they wronged you. The individual that is hurting the most is you. One of the biggest advantages of forgiveness is the peace that it will bring to your heart.
It relieve a wound in your heart.
Just like my former pastor that had a chainsaw accident, matters in our lives can certainly leave scars. The wound in his leg healed up. It left a scar, but gave him no further problems. My friend, when you feel a deep hurt, forgiveness is what relieve that wound.
It Stops Victimhood Mentality
When someone has wronged you, it’s handy to think that they destroyed your life. You might even think that they ruined your whole future, and you’ll never be joyful and happy with your life. That’s a lot of pain to live with.
The other issues with this mindset is, that it paints you as the innocent victim, and puts you in a position, where you feel like you can’t do anything about it. That’s known as victimhood mentality.
When you forgive somebody you take back manage of your life. You acknowledge the wound, and the results of what happened, but you also give yourself permission, and the freedom to move on. You move from a bouncing position in the back of a covered wagon to sitting in the driver’s seat and taking control. This puts you back in charge of your own life.
It Helps Your Other Relationships
It’s tough to have other good healthy relationships with you are holding a anger, or walking around with tartness in your heart. Those matter poison your other relationships. Not forgiving plants a seed of doubt in your loved ones’ thought of “What if I ever mess up so badly that they never forgive me?”
When you forgive others it assist you love people better, specially those close to you. That’s a great advantage of forgiveness!
